In the year of the Lord 1666. Cambridgeshire County. England.
Act I: Lucy
After a rainy-sunny-wintery-foggy-sunny-stormy- and finally sunny again morning, Mr. Twisted’s sheep were happy to go back to the field, hungry for fresh pasture.
Mr. Twisted was keeping an eye on them, specially on his most favorite one: Lucy.
Lucy was a beautiful, shaggy and very obedient ewe, though sometimes she turned herself rebel and independent from the sheep flock.
That day she felt like been a free spirit; after watching their pals going in the same direction, right straight to the same part of the field.
- Poor them - she thought - They look like sheep
After scanning the horizon, she saw something really beautiful. A rainbow. A majestic one. A perfect colorful arch.
- Hmmm… I want to try that grass. Sure it’s juicier and fresher under the rainbow.
So she went where the rainbow was, under the strict Mr. Twisted eyes.
The grass was displayed in different colors there. You could see blue grass, yellow grass, purple grass, red grass, and even green grass too.
- I will follow an order, she thought, and then I will make my review.
She started with the purple one. It was not bad. A bit strange, to her taste. Then the blue one. It was cold, like ice. But the green one was PERFECT. The best green grass she had never tasted so far. The yellow one was a bit dry, and the orange one was sweet, delicious.
And the red one?
- The red one was hot, as you can imagine - she said
Mr. Twisted called the sheep back. Silly, the dog, was barking them like crazy. Lucy hated his barks. But she never confessed it to him. She just played along with him, not to make the poor old feel useless, as he was.
The next morning Mr. Twisted entered in the stable to milk them, as every morning did. He started by his favourite one, Lucy.
- Here I am, my shaggy little ewe! Let’s see what you have this morning. You’re my dear one. You know that, don’t you?
- Baaaaaaa!!!! - she said.
- Damn, Lucy!!! - You are pretty abundant this morning. What a spring! WOW!!! And your milk smells delicious. Even more than usual!!!
It was true, as she could fill a whole tin can with her fresh milk. It was a miracle! And actually, it smelt delicious.
- You know something? Gonna make a cheese for Sir Isaac, the Alchemist. He is always very considerate man with me.
So he kept that milk apart for the cheese.
Act II: The Cheese
- Yes, sir! This is a real masterpiece. What a piece of cheese! I’m gonna envy Sir Isaac, the Alchemist. But I believe nobody deserves this cheese more than him, as he is a so wise and kind and considerate person to me.
He put his best clothes on and went to visit Sir Isaac. It was a sunny afternoon in the county and Silly, the stupid dog, was accompanying him. Barking everywhere, as usual.
Sir Isaac’s house was just two miles away. It was a pretty nice walk.
- He is a so mysterious man - he said - All the time enclosed in his house when he is not at TheUniverstity, doing his crazy experiments, trying to find the magical potion…. But sure he is contributing to science. May God bless him! He deserves this bloody cheese!!!!
Finally he came. Sir Isaac’s house was a humble one. A beautiful countryside house, sharpened in the orange Cambridgeshire’s horizon.
- Who is there???
Mr. Twisted was shocked, again, as Sir Isaac, the Alchemist rarely spoke. He was a few words man. A man of facts. And his voice always sounded deep and scary to him.
- It’s Mr. Twisted, Sir! I’ve got something for you!
Sir Isaac opened violently the door. He was wearing that so ridiculous wig, as usual. Mr. Twisted was starting to think that he was bald.
- Sir Isaac. I’m so sorry if I’m interrupting you in your so important researches. Please, forgive this poor man who only wants to offer you the best cheese ever made, directly from the best ewe’s udders. This is for you, Sir. Please, accept it as a proof of gratitude. You are always kind and friendly with your humble servant.
- That’s true, my beloved friend. I’m so thankful for your present. It smells delicious. Shall you enter in my humble house to share this cheese?
- I’m deeply sorry, Sir. I hope you understand that I’m a very busy man and my sheep need me. That’s the life of a shepherd.
- I understand you, my friend. I am, as you know, a very busy man, too. Be aware of the wolves, tonight.
- Thank you, Sir. I will! I have my brave dog with me, so nothing can happen to us, right Silly?
They said goodbye and Mr. Twisted started the way back home, with the crazy dog.
- Wow! Every time Sir Isaac speaks to me I feel like dizzy. He must have some aura or something. They say some people have.
It was true. Sir Isaac always produced on people the same effect. When he spoke, people in five foot around went dizzy.
- Hurry up, Silly! We have to get home before it gets darker. And don’t forget: Lucy is waiting for me!
A wolf started howling in that very moment.
Act III: The Discovery
The cheese smelt delicious. No doubt. But Sir Isaac was so deeply involved in his work, trying to find the secret potion, than he fell asleep, like a small kid, with the head on the table.
Maybe half of the county heard that night Sir Isaac’s snores, as he had such heavy tough voice.
The next day morning the sun was shinny and the birds were singing. Sir Isaac woke up with a huge headache. Too much work, maybe. Trying to find the secret potion…
He decided to have a healthful breakfast:
- The cheese, some grapes and of course, the red wine. And don't forget the Nutella - he said
He cut a big piece of cheese. It smelt so nice and mouthwatering. Sir Isaac put a big piece on his mouth.
- Hmmmmm. It’s delicious, no doubt! Mr. Twisted really cares about me.
He drank the wine and then, another piece of cheese. It was the best cheese he had ever tasted.
He went to his studio, looking for more wine, and then, when he came back to the table, there it was!!!! A rainbow on the wall, coming out from the cheese!!!
- Holy shit!!!! I’ve invented the homemade rainbow!!!!
Then he fell back and hit his head against the chair.
Sir Isaac's Cheese
Every single act has its consequences, right? So let me tell you the five consequences of this crazy story:
Sir Isaac, the Alchemist, also know as Sir Isaalc because of his serious addiction to any kind of brew, he was put into a hospital after suffering a scary delirium tremens.
Mr. Twisted was prosecuted and hanged for animal abuse, disorderly conduct, drug dealing and selling cheese with opioids.
The Cambridge’s University, the eldest pub in town, was closed due to the relationship with the three facts related previously.
Lucy, the ewe, was sacrificed the day after, as they didn’t consider her meat suitable for human consume. Her body was burnt in the field.
Sir Isaac Newton, the Alchemist (and also the Cambridge professor), heard about the poor drunk man episode, and he visited him a couple of times at the hospital, using his influence as a scientist.
A few weeks after, he concluded his studies about the behavior of white light, making possible to bring a rainbow at home just with a prism of glass and a sunbeam. No doubt, one of the most beautiful science experiments ever.
Newton's prism explained
Behind the scene
Of course, cheese cannot make light dispersion at all ;) Neither cycles, the render engine I've used, inside Blender. The color spectrum has been made using a spot light projecting a bitmap on the wall. The same than a video projector. It's a fake :(
There is a lot of things that I really love in this image, so I can say I'm vary glad and satisfied with the final result. You can find many influences on it: Claesz Heda, Zurbarán, and specially my dear Vermeer.
With no doubt, Vermeer is for me one of my most favorite artists.
As they say in the last times that he could may have used the camera obscura to make his paintings I have tried to give a similar look: most of the elements are out of focus, the size of the image is a perfect square, and the vignette around the scene is typical of the camera obscura projections. To achieve that effect I have put the camera inside a real black box with a small hole on it.
There is another wink to Vermeer. Maybe the Earth globe looks familiar to you, doesn't it? ;) The funny thing is that the maps on it are fully procedural shapes made using blender nodes.
I'm finding procedural textures more and more interesting... You will see ;)
Note: I'm not a native English speaker and sometimes I think I'm writing too much ;) Anyway I apologize for every single mistake I make with your beautiful language. If you feel like correcting me or giving me some advice, please, don't hesitate: drop me a line! I'll be glad to read you!